What I Have To Be

The deepest level of communication is not communication, 

but communion. It is wordless. It is beyond words …

It is beyond speech, it is beyond concept …

We already are one, but we imagine we are not.

And what we have to recover is our original unity.

What we have to be is what we are

                                                                                                - Thomas Merton

Writing these blog pieces is often one of the hardest things I do. I start, lose my way, and question why I’m even writing. I pray for inspiration, asking whether I should continue at all. Sometimes the answer feels like “no,” and I’m left wondering if I’m asking the right question. I return to the page, sensing that this very struggle might be part of my path—part of who I am—just as Merton suggests.

So …  I’ve written several reflections on my study of Buddhism and how practicing the diligent act of letting go of self-cherishing—and moving beyond putting myself first—has helped me become a more compassionate and caring Christian, which is my root faith.

Christianity remains my foundation, and the Buddhist “telos” of compassion has deepened my understanding of Christ’s call to mercy and forgiveness. It has helped me grow in wisdom and receive a spiritual strength that feels more like grace than effort.

Voices like Thomas Merton and Thomas Keating have helped me recognize, in their words, that “the God of all the great religions is the same” … that  “we do not belong to one particular religion; we belong to God.”

Both Christianity and Buddhism call us to release, but in different words, our false self and awaken to the true self in God. Christ’s commandment to “love your neighbor as yourself” echoes the Buddhist teaching to “cherish yourself no more than you cherish others.

The last line of Merton's quote finally helped me finish this post: “What we have to be is what we are.” I wonder if these writing struggles are simply part of “what I am,” and if so, perhaps they, too, are “what I have to be.”

Source: Ress, Mary. Being Prayer. Nutshell Publications, Houston. 2006

Images: R. Raymond, 2025

Rick Raymond, Spiritual Director

Individuals and Family Businesses

www.rbraymond.com